Testimony: finding God’s blessing in the waiting

Interviewed by Elizabeth Ecker

I’m delighted that Tenille Rounds is able to sit down with me in a busy week of Easter preparation to talk about how she has personally witnessed God’s blessings amidst the trials of life—those May flowers we yearn for in the overcast days of spring showers…or perhaps snowstorms, as we are witnessing out her office window at Calvary! As always, she greets me with a warm smile and hug, and we settle in to chat about her family.

Tenille relates that she and her husband, Matt, and their children, Jada and Logan, attended Calvary for several years before she joined the leadership team as the Director of Kids’ Ministry. However, she would identify herself primarily as a homeschooling mother and wife, spending her days learning alongside Jada and Logan. Tenille enjoys many hobbies, including singing, sewing, and crafting. She also loves family nights playing board games, watching classic cinema, and taking in theatre productions, especially as their children grow older. Tenille shares, “I’m not what you’d consider outdoorsy; however, I feel the majesty of God most when I am in His creation.” On their vacation to Hawaii last year, they were awed by the beauty of God’s world: “It brings me to tears, how creative, powerful, merciful, and mighty God is! I’ve always told my kids that God is the ultimate artist. I’m in awe: He made all of this beauty, yet He cares so much for each of us. Basking in His creation helps me remember how great He is, but also, how compassionate. When I go through difficult things, this same God truly does care for me through it all.”

Most Calvary members see Tenille in the capacity of kids’ or worship ministry each week, but she relates that she is more of a numbers geek: her degree is in Accounting and Financial Services, and she loves an orderly spreadsheet! She hadn’t envisioned herself as a teacher in her early marriage, but life circumstances kept Tenille and Matt transitioning, even when they weren’t looking for the change. “We joke that we are professional waiters in this world! We desire stability and the things of our heart right now, but God prunes us and uses that time of waiting for our growth, if we allow Him.” Her life story illustrates this hard-earned wisdom.

Matt and Tenille were high school sweethearts, marrying shortly after they finished high school. After four years of marriage, they planned to start a family, but in the summer of 2003, they lost their first child to miscarriage. Heartbroken, they prayed through this difficulty, deciding that a move back to Chicago would be a solid next step so that Matt could finish his degree. Two weeks after the move was completed, they found they were expecting once again, and in February 2005, Jada was born. “In the coming years, God would use her in big ways to help us through the hardest experiences of our lives,” Tenille explains.

A few years later, Matt was in a period of employment transition, and the couple was trying to decide if God wanted him to pursue a different career path, when Tenille found out she was pregnant once again. They were elated to be welcoming another little one! After their 20-week ultrasound, however, they were told that their son had anecephaly, a neural tube defect whereby his brain, skull, and scalp did not form in the first few weeks of pregnancy. “The doctor used the phrase ‘incompatible with life.’ After I heard those words, the rest of our visit was a blur,” Tenille recalls. Carrying and delivering a child that you will meet and hold only briefly is incredibly difficult, and the Rounds were “steeped in grief. Though family and friends prayed unceasingly for us, we weren’t sure what to do. Matt’s career path wasn’t becoming clear to us, we were barely making ends meet, we were considering a move, and we were planning a funeral for our son.” Through this difficult time, Jada, in her youthful innocence, made life joyful in the midst of the heartache. Tenille remembers, “We would sit in our living room , watching her spin in circles while singing in her sweet little voice.” Even in the darkness and storms, slivers of light still permeated their lives.

Isaac Matthew was born on July 11, 2008, and Tenille says, “He lived eleven short hours, but in that time, he was so loved.” In the months that followed Isaac’s birth, the Rounds family was faced with new challenges: “They say that after significant loss, it isn’t a good idea to make other big changes in your life, such as a job change or a move, but we did it all.” While they were living apart out of necessity as Matt started a new job, Jada was again a light that kept Tenille moving forward. “There were many mornings Jada would literally take my hand and pull me out of bed. If it hadn’t been for her, there may have been many times I would have stayed in bed all day. She kept me going.” As Matt and Tenille moved through their grief, they struggled to communicate, and their marriage felt the strain. Tenille joined a GriefShare class at their new church, which helped her significantly, and she was able to share her experience with others who were moving through loss. Friends reached out with truth and scripture, helping her “navigate this scary, unknown, and often lonely path.”

In 2010, God blessed the Rounds with Logan Isaac, and although this season of life was challenging, God was leading Tenille with a new calling: to teach her children. “This isn’t a PSA for homeschooling,” she laughs, “but I truly believe that God used homeschooling as an opportunity to reveal His deep love for me, renew my faith in Him, and ultimately, save my life. It’s difficult to explain, but God used kindergarten unit studies on His creation to teach me more about His greatness, His deep and unconditional love, and His faithfulness. I experienced God more in those first few months of homeschooling than I had my entire life. He brought me out of a pit of despair, slowly began restoring our marriage, and healed my broken heart in ways I didn’t think were possible.” The simple lessons resonated deeply with Tenille as she moved into a new season of life and growth.

When I asked her about the perspective she has gained in this ongoing flux between hardship and blessing, Tenille insists, “Oh, I’m still growing and learning! I feel our experiences have helped our kids see the real struggles of life. We’ve had spiritual conversations that wouldn’t have happened otherwise. Waiting, praying, expecting hardship in life, and relying on God for strength might be the greatest lessons we can offer our children before they leave our sides.” Psalm 34:18 continues to resonate with Tenille: “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in Spirit.” She agrees, “I often wish losing two of my children wasn’t part of my story, but I am grateful that God doesn’t waste our grief; he uses these hardships for His glory.”

The lyrics to the song “Bring the Rain,” by Mercy Me, have been especially dear to Tenille: “Bring me joy, bring me peace/Bring the chance to be free/Bring me anything that brings you glory/And I know there’ll be days/When this life brings me pain/But if that’s what it takes to praise You/Jesus, bring the rain.”

Compassion, empathy, and the desire to walk through similar situations with others have been the flowers that could only have bloomed with God’s hand following the storms of loss and hardship.

---

Tenille Rounds is a homemaker and homeschooling mom who deeply loves Jesus, her hardworking husband, and her kids. Her days are filled with teaching, field trips, chauffeuring, and taking care of her family. She is a night owl and introvert who cherishes the peaceful hours after everyone is asleep. In her free time, she likes to sew, craft, sing, and enjoys being involved in her church and community.