That I May Know Him

Jesus offers us a relationship with him.  We can miss it, or find it but neglect it, or pursue it and grow it.   What causes us to miss it or find it and neglect it?  And what does it take to grow it?

[00:00:01] Well. Good morning, Calvary. Look at this full house. I want to assure you this morning, I know her. I know how she walks. So, in a crowded mall, I can have my back turned and I can tell if Michelle is coming up behind me several stores down. I usually know her attitude just by the way she walks upstairs getting dressed in the morning, I know her. I know how she drives. I can be in the backyard, in my garden and I can tell by the way she accelerates if it’s her car coming up the street. I know her. I know what she’s going to say. Married couples do you do this a lot where you finish their sentence? They go, how did you know I was going to say that? Even if it’s some random, bizarre thing and you finish their sentences. You just get to know them. It’s a beautiful thing to get to know somebody deeply over a long period of time. Did you know that God wants to know you like that? And have you know him like that? Some of you are really like that? Know his walk, his ways, finish his sentences? Yes, really, really. In fact, better than I know Michelle. So just before we get started this morning, I’d probably better back that up so I don’t have a lot of skeptics out there. So let’s just do a little bit of a review of Scripture and talk about a couple metaphors of how God describes how he wants us to know him.

[00:01:45] So first of all, if Scripture had a thread that you hung all 13,000 plus verses on like pearls, this would be the thread. I’ll be your God, you’ll be my people, we will be together. It’s from Genesis chapter two with Adam and Eve in the garden, all the way to revelation, where Jesus will live among us in a new heaven and a new earth. He wants to be with us, that’s a relationship. So, you know, sin happens in Genesis three, and God banishes the ones he wants to know from his presence. And the whole Old Testament sets up Christmas where Jesus, God’s son comes. Emmanuel, which means God with us. That’s a relationship. Jesus calls apprentices disciples around him as he is doing his ministry. And Mark tells us he called 12, actually 70 and more in this circle. He called 12 disciples that they might be with him, and then he’d send them out. He wants to be with us in a relationship. And the last thing Matthew records that Jesus said to his apprentices is, I will be with you till the end of the age. So Scripture fleshes out that relationship he wants us to have with him with many metaphors. I want to just give you three this morning to help you understand, to rivet into our souls just how he wants us to know him.

[00:03:27] The first comes from Ephesians chapter five. Paul is picked up by the Spirit of God like an inner tube is picked up by a current and is carried along to write about a man and woman in a spirit filled relationship. Not perfect. Right? We’re prickly. We’re unfinished. It’s not always pretty. But where they learn to love and respect each other and they hang in there together. He says at the end of Ephesians five, I want to tell you a mystery, something you could never know unless I tipped my cards that men and women spirit-filled in a covenantal relationship is a picture of Jesus Christ and His wiggly people, his bride, the church. Both collectively and I believe you individually if you’re his follower. He wants a relationship like that, only better. I don’t do a lot of marriages anymore, but when I do marriage premarital counseling, I almost always say this to the couple. You do realize, right, you’re just a scratch and sniff. They go, what? I see several furrowed brows out there. You’re just a scratch and sniff. You need to know this going in. God placed you in each other’s lives as a scratch and sniff. Do we still have those books? Scratch the strawberry and it kind of smells like it. Even in your best days together,I tell the future couple, you’re just an aroma of a deeper relationship God intends for you. You’re a reminder, an appetizer, as it were. You’ll never satisfy each other fully. You’re scratch and sniff.

[00:05:15] I should back up and let you know that I almost miss Michelle. No, I really did. I came that close to missing her altogether. I was about college age and I decided for some reason, God intended me to be a single man. I had guys around me in college that I talked kind of into that real bravado. We called ourselves bachelors till rapture. Then my bachelor buddies all got married one by one. I really did this, i gave them just in fun sympathy cards. Their wives didn’t find that very funny. Then by the grace of God, maybe about age 27, I use my accounting degree to do a little audit of my life. And here’s what I found. I found that I was a deeply romantic person. I found that when I traveled 20 days a month, I spent an inordinate amount of time watching couples in restaurants, wondering what their life was like, what they were talking about. And when I got off the road, I spent almost all my time with my little nieces and nephews. Just love those kids. I was Uncle Bim. And then I realized, you need a woman in your life. So I called up those buddies that I sent the cards to, and I said, I got to eat crow here. I need a woman in my life. They go, we knew that already. By the grace of God, I found her. And I committed myself to her. I remember part of our vows was you will be apart from God, my highest priority and my greatest human joy. We went all in. But over the years of our marriage, there were times that I wasn’t doing so hot at that. I’d hear her say things like, I feel so alone. And then I realized that the kids or the ministry had kept me, had kept me from really feeding into that relationship. And thankfully, Michelle was way too bossy to let me get away with it. We got help. We shed things. We hung in. It wasn’t always pretty. Now I truly can tell you when we’re sitting in those big comfy chairs in the kitchen or snuggling, we more and more frequently hear the others say, what would I ever do without you? Well, you know, the answer to that really is, I’m just a scratch and sniff. Build your relationship with the real thing and then you’ll get through it day by day. You follow me? I could have not cultivated that relationship. Instead, we decided to feed it and grow it. And now we finish each other’s sentences.

[00:08:31] And that’s what God wants to have us have with Jesus. I think I can show that today. Before I do, there are people in this room certainly watching, certainly in Philippi, where our text is from, that responded in different ways to that, very similar to my response to having a wife. Some said I don’t need it. Some of you maybe say I don’t need it. If you’re filling in the notes, I should probably give you all three of them. Some are saying I won’t heed it, meaning pay attention to it. I thought maybe the rhyme would help and some will say I desperately want to feed it.

[00:09:13] Okay, so that’s what we’re going to look at this morning. Jesus wants this relationship with us. We’re going to be in Philippians chapter three. Philippians is a remarkable letter. Remarkable. When I taught at Shaffer, I would say to the kids, when we came to this letter, we’re going to read it all out loud in class. And here’s what I want you to do as we read it, i want you to find my mama’s life verse. It’s in here. So if you think we get to a verse and you think that’s my mama’s life verse, you raise your hand. You’ll read it again and I’ll write the reference on the whiteboard. Got it. And here’s the other deal is you can change your vote at any time. Just put your hand up and go, I want that one instead. Oh, this is fun. I’ll bet you that whiteboard has 30 references on it. It’s like t-shirt material from beginning to end. Stuff that if you lived out that verse your whole life, your world would be different. Paul writes this encouraging letter to this little church he planted. He’s probably in prison, and it’s just about having the joy, joy, joy, joy of Jesus, a relationship with Jesus down in your heart, regardless of how bad your life is. And right in the middle of this amazing, joyful letter, he puts a warning. Chapter three, starting at verse two about how we respond to our relationship offered to us in Jesus. Let’s take a look at it. Philippians chapter three. I hope you got your workbooks with. You can look at it on the screen, but I hope you’ll be looking down and maybe even taking some notes. Paul first addresses people, religious people, probably well intended religious people in Philippi. In this room as follows, look out for the dogs, look out for the evildoers, look out for those who mutilate the flesh. Be constantly aware of what I’m going to warn you about. And dogs, by the way, that doesn’t resonate with us, right? How many of you have dogs? We love our dogs. Don’t get me started about Charlie, okay? Love our dogs. Not here, dogs in that culture, in this context, were scavenging dangerous, flea ridden animals.

[00:11:44] Beware of these scavengers. Beware of these evil workers. They have malice intent. What are they out there doing? They’re saying by mutilating your flesh, being circumcised and keeping the law, you’ll repair your broken relationship with God. Back in acts chapter 15, which happened years earlier, Paul has to run to Jerusalem, where religious leaders are saying this, unless you keep the law and are circumcised, you cannot be right with God. Chores. You do, these chores, they make you right with God. Paul saying, anybody who’s out there saying we fix a broken relationship with a holy God with chores, they’re dogs, scavengers preying on you evil workers. Beware of them Philippians. Jesus wants a relationship with us. He wants us to have a relationship with him. And it’s not by chores. These people should have known better, but they misread the Old Testament. They’re not alone. Let’s read verse three and following. Paul compares them to we are the circumcision, the true people of Christ. Genesis 17, God gave the sign of circumcision to his people, an outward sign of an inward covenantal relationship. We’re the true circumcision who worship by the Spirit of God and glory in Christ Jesus and put no confidence in our chores, our fleshly works. Paul almost missed this relationship with Jesus for the first 30 plus years of his life.

[00:13:29] Look at verses four through six, though I myself have reason for confidence in the flesh also. If anyone else, any of you thinks he has reason for confidence in the flesh, I have more. Now listen to his resume. Circumcised on the eighth day Old Testament law check. Of the people of Israel. I am God’s chosen people, check. Of the Tribe of Benjamin, one of the two faithful tribes. They all stunk in the Old Testament. Read it. But at least they were kept by God because God had made a promise through them. A Hebrew of Hebrews. Man, I’m the real deal. Look up a Hebrew in the dictionary, you might see my picture. As to the law, a Pharisee. I was the goody two shoes. Nope, don’t do that. Do this. All those rules, I kept them. How well do I keep them? Well, we’ll get to that in a minute. As to zeal for God, a persecutor of this cult, Jesus’s church. As to the righteousness under the law, blameless. He’s saying, who among you could throw shade at me for any way I broke the law? Wow, he could have missed it. I don’t need Jesus in a relationship with him. And he did for the first 30 some years of his life. I’m baffled. I’m sure there are people listening or here that just don’t feel like they need Jesus, religious minded people.

[00:15:12] I’m baffled by that. I mean, right in scripture, we only get to the third chapter of Genesis where God made us for relationship, but it’s broken. They’re banished from the garden, and they can’t even draw near to God without an offering of an innocent sacrifice. So strayed, so lost, can’t find their way back. And you know, the prophet Isaiah warned them, don’t try to do chores to get your way back. All your righteous chores to gain my favor are filthy in my eyes. They’re filthy rags. I used to ask my students, now mind you, they’re seventh graders. Imagine with me for a moment I did something despicable to betray my wife. They know Michelle because I talk about her all the time. Just despicable and it wounded her to the core and put out her heart light for me, as it were. How would I ever get back in her favor? And I say, imagine I come to her and I got a list. What’s the list? Well, it’s ten things I promised to do faithfully for you going forward. Now, ironically, the boys think that that’ll work better than the girls. You know, Bob the builder. We can fix it. Yes we can. The girls aren’t so hot about that. No. Matter of fact, in their own seventh grade way, they say, you know, that would wound me more deeply. You think you could fix my broken heart with chores? Really? And I say, so how would he fix it? And the little girl in the back would go, How about come to me teary eyed and apologize and plead for my mercy and wait and see if my heart will come back on? Does that sound better, ladies? I’m seeing a lot of head shake. What is it with chores? God says trust. Trust in what I’ve done for you. I want to do a little something here. I wasn’t going to do this, but I’m going to try something a little edgy. I’m going to ask you to remember when you were a kid, you could imagine way better than an adult. We’re going to imagine something right here, right now. I remember when I was in college Campus Crusade. I was a part of that and when they had you share the gospel with somebody, they’d often encourage you to ask this question. If you died right now and were we’re standing before a holy God. And he said, why should I let you into eternity? What would you say? You heard this question before from people? So I want to do this right now. I just want you to close your eyes. This isn’t going to be too weird. You could do this at home. But I want to do this here. Close your eyes and I’m going to ask you to take a deep breath and imagine it’s the last breath you take in this world, right? Deep breath.

[00:18:05] Breathe it out and you’re gone. You’re standing before a holy God. Imagine this immense light. John tells us God is like light. And from that light, you hear this voice say your name. Why should you spend eternity with me? Now I want you to imagine looking straight into that light and saying, I’m as good as you, that’s why. That’s what it is when we say chores makes us right with the Holy God. How could anybody say that? I want you to do it again, but for a different result. Okay. Close your eyes. All right take that big, deep breath and you are gone into eternity. Go ahead. Now, I want you to imagine you’re in front of that light again. But this time you’re like a little child again. Only you got your legs wrapped around a waist, and you got your arms wrapped around somebody’s neck, and your face is pressed against that person’s face. And now you hear that voice from the light, say, why should I spend eternity with you? You can look up now at me, and you just look and say, that’s Jesus, because I’m with him. You picture that. That’s what it means to trust. Is it going to be chores let me in? I’ve been righteous. Or is it going to be the only reason is I’m with him?

[00:19:58] Some didn’t need it. Paul almost didn’t need it. But thankfully, Paul did an inventory and he woke up. Look at verse seven. This is beautiful. But whatever gain I had, all those chores, all that stuff Paul did up in verses four through six. But whatever was gained to me, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Notice I’ve underlined on the screen I counted past tense verb. He came to a point where he said, like I did when I was late 20s. I need him, this doesn’t work. I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. And what did he count? What was the audit he did? Verse nine, to be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own from the law. Found in him, which is the last part, a righteousness that comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith or a righteousness of my own that comes from the law. And he weighed those two things and said, I’m going all in on Jesus. And he made that vow to be all his. Thankfully, Paul was wiser than I was in my 36 years of marriage. He knew he had to cultivate that and prioritize Jesus every day. How many of you are aware of the term mail order bride like in old westerns, right? Some desperate woman from some faraway place is willing to marry sight unseen some desperate man, probably with a couple of little toddlers. You know, wife died in labor or something, right? Did you know there’s still mail-order brides today? I looked it up. There’s 150,000 women out there who are putting themselves out to be mail order brides. And there’s a few men mail order husbands, but nobody wants us, right? Oh, I have to tell you, I feel more often than not like a mail order bride. I’ve committed myself. And someday, whether it’s that last breath I take or the return of Jesus, I’ll finally get to meet the groom. I don’t want that. Not when Jesus offers to me and to us what he offers us in today’s text. To know him. Jesus uses several metaphors besides marriage that we should touch on. He uses the metaphor of the yoke. In Matthew chapter 11 Jesus says, come to me. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, and you’ll find rest or wholeness for your soul. That place you were intended to be, that’s a relationship. In a yoke will be even more riveting. And when you understand it, you know we’re not into the yoke thing. People who heard Jesus knew about yokes very well. So let me explain it real quick. Jesus, his stepdad Joseph Carpenter’s right, he taught him the trade. Blacksmith, carpenter. I’m sure they built yokes. So a farmer would bring in two cows, a big old steer, strong or a cow strong, seasoned, muscular and a new little apprentice, a cow in training. Jesus would measure them up and he’d make that wood bar that goes across the back, custom fit for those two animals. So that when they went out to plough in that yoke, here’s what would happen. The older, mature cow, the stronger one would set all the direction. I mean, the young one might chafe in the yoke for a while, you know, and try to do his thing. But she was way stronger. And so she set the direction and she provided most of the power. He just did his part. He responded to her tugs and he did his part. Jesus said, what kind of relationship do we want? Should you have with me a yoked one? This is custom made for you and me. Don’t look at other Christians around you. They got their own one with me, custom built. You’re different. I’ll provide the direction. You just be ruthlessly obedient to respond. And I’m always doing this for our good. And I’ll provide most of the power. You just do your part and together, side by side, in an intimate, moment by moment apprenticeship, we’ll learn each other’s moves. That’s the kind of relationship he wants. Jesus goes deeper the night before his death, and he uses the metaphor of a vine and branch.

[00:25:04] What kind of relationship do I want you to have with me? Do I offer you? Where you draw your very daily sustenance and energy and vitality from me, and you produce fruit that looks like mine. That’s what I’m offering you. Many of you will go home today, and you’ll look at that Fraser fir in the corner of your living room. It still looks pretty, doesn’t it? But it’s dead. That’s what he offers us. And many in Philippi said they didn’t need it. Paul finally woke up and said, I need it and I will feed it. And that’s precisely what he did. Look at verse eight. He wasn’t going to let it linger, be neglected. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus, my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ. From the moment he got up, you know, pushing back all those demands, like wild animals picking at you, he would say, I want to place you first. I want to be in the yoke beside you today. I want to draw my life from you. I want to intimately know you like I’m husband and wife in a covenantal relationship. Everything today is going to pull at that. But help me to take steps today to know Oh, you. Everything else is secondary.

[00:26:34] It doesn’t matter to me as much as knowing you. And that takes work. And it grows on you when I’m told we’re coming to that. He kept on counting. I underlined that twice. It’s a present thing. You have to do it every day. I counted, we just saw in verse seven was past tense. Make a decision. Is it going to be works of righteous deeds, chores, or is it going to be trust in Jesus? And once you make that decision every day, put it first the relationship with Christ. Paul didn’t let it linger. He shed other things. He kept it a priority. And why did he do this? Why did he count it more precious than anything? Verses ten and 11, by the way, verse ten is my mama’s verse. That I may know him. I count these things rubbish that I may grow and know him here, not just hereafter. That I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead. What does all that mean? I’m going to summarize it in three words in just a moment, but here’s what it doesn’t mean. See the last verse 11 that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead. How many of you in this room think that actually means Paul was biting his nails, that if he took his last breath or Jesus returned, he wasn’t sure if he was going to belong to God through Jesus Christ?

[00:28:20] Please don’t raise your hand. He says to Timothy in one of his final letters, maybe his last. I know whom I have believed, and I am confident he is able to guard what I have committed to him until that day. He knew he belonged. He was, I’m with him. What’s the resurrection from the dead? That resurrection words only used here. It’s literally out resurrection.  What’s he want to attain out of? He wants to be raised out of his old life and become like Jesus. And that’s what those other words mean. The power of his resurrection. I want to become like you and bear fruit for you. I want that old man to be gone. Slowly transform me to be like you, as I’m in the yoke beside you, drawing my nourishment from you, intimately covenanted to you. That’s what I want. And suffering will happen. Oh my goodness. If you’re in the yoke beside Jesus, as we’ll see shortly. It means dying to a lot of things that you want or the world wants. And it means when you do God’s will, it means getting whacked by people around you sometimes. It’s tough to kill that old dude that Tim was.

[00:29:52] So how do we feed it? So if you’re taking notes again, I got four things. First of all, I should say, after the first service, I was told to make this anonymous. Somebody came up to me and said, well, we probably feed the relationship with Jesus more if we weren’t so full of ourselves. Isn’t that great? Just no hunger there because we’re the idol of our lives, so full of ourselves. And there’s many ways that we feed this. I’m just going to give you four. One you’d get immediately if I had did a survey. We get to know Jesus through Scripture. Imagine if from the time I could draw or print, I kept a journal every day of my thoughts, actions, how I felt about stuff. All the way till last night, every day. And one of you found it and you slogged through it. How many think that person who found it would know me pretty well? In some ways, better than my own family, probably. But there’s a warning here or a danger. Paul, who was Saul of Tarsus, that Pharisee, that lawyer. That’s what he was, that brilliant Old Testament scholar. He knew the first two thirds of Scripture pretty well, and he didn’t know Jesus. Because it didn’t soak through and the spirit didn’t convict him. God’s spirit didn’t do his work. C.S. Lewis, I think, says when you approach Scripture, he says, approach it as stain, not paint. Paint sits on the surface. Stain soaks in. We get to know him here. We get to know him through his people. So they were first called Christians at Antioch. Acts tells us. Does anybody know what Christian means literally? Little Christ. We’re called the body of Christ. And Scripture tells us Jesus works in and through people around us. Sometimes we need Jesus. You know, even being beside him in the yoke, he needs to give us someone with skin on to show us how to love the unlovely, forgive the unforgivable, H\have grit to persevere in difficult situations. You know, people like that? You’re thinking of somebody right now, Jesus coming through those people. We get to know him deeper through the people around us in community. Here’s the third one. You know, that little action we did about imagine being before a holy God. It’s practice being with Jesus. You know, we often say, if I asked you, what do you want more for this coming year? I want to spend more time with Jesus. And for many of us, we don’t really know exactly what that means other than, you know, throwing a few prayers out or reading the word or sitting still and quiet. So I have a dear, dear person in my life who has a standing date with Jesus at Panera at 7 a.m. every morning. They have their own corner table. She sees him walk in. She says that he wears blue jeans and a dark blue dress shirt, and he takes his coffee black with lots of cream. And sometimes they just smile at each other. Apparently, he smiles a lot with his eyes, especially. Sometimes they’ll talk about people in the restaurant and how to pray for them, or even go over and encourage them. Plan their day. You go, couldn’t that get a little weird? I suppose, but he said he’d be with us always. He said he was our friend. I don’t call you servants. I call you friends. How do you spend time with a friend who’s not there? Don’t you sometimes imagine them or think about them? I don’t think you’re going to get too weird if you’re soaking in Scripture, you’re not going to get too wacky. And uh, if you do, if you’re surrounded by people and community, we’ll call you off the ledge. Practicing his presence. He said he’d be with us, being more present with Jesus. That’s how we get to know him. Hanging around. And the last one, I want to go back to the yoke. So soak in Scripture. Be surrounded by his people that he flows through. Practice being more with Jesus and respond to the yoke. I really hope you pick up that metaphor. He’s right here by me in an intimate apprenticeship, side by side all the time. He provides the direction. I just need to respond. He provides most of the power I need to do my part, and over time, we’ll get to know each other’s moves. Responding in the yoke to him. I’ll give you an example. It happened recently. This is kind of embarrassing. So we have volunteers that answered the phone in the office. We had several of them that had to step down. So I decided a couple of months ago, do we really need to have live phone answering in our office? So I thought I’d do a little survey of churches. I call a couple of larger churches and I get their answering machines. So I’m going, hey, this is going well. We probably don’t need to fill those spots. And then I called Autumn Ridge and I got a live, very cheerful person. And as soon as she answered the phone, I went wrong number. And then I got this in the yoke from Jesus, and it was like, your pants are on fire Tim. Yep, I know that. What are you going to do about it? This is embarrassing. I’m 64 years old. I’m a pastor of another church. So I dial it right up. She answers the phone. I said, my name is Tim Nelson, I just called you. I told you that I got the wrong number. That was just a flat out lie and please forgive me. I was just calling around to see if churches answer their phones, and I don’t know why I did that, and I’m so sorry.

[00:36:43] And she tried to Pooh Pooh it and make it easy. I mean, don’t make it easy on me. I can’t become like Jesus like that and we had the most delightful conversation. Even as I think about it now, it’s as if Jesus is going, well, that was easy, wasn’t it? You did something wrong and one of my people showed you grace. And as if Jesus says back, I do things honestly and I get whacked for it. We had a good laugh. Jesus said, don’t worry, that’s coming. You’ll get that too. I’ve got that planned if you want to become like me. To respond in the yoke to our Savior, side by side sometimes we have to ask for your power. I can’t do this. It’s very embarrassing to be 64 in your pants on fire with a fellow church. But if I want to become like him, I have to do that by his power. And over time, if I do that and many other areas of life, I’ll die to that old Tim, and I’ll be raised to a newer life, and his fruit will sprout in my life because I’m drawing my nourishment from him. Does this make sense? In the year ahead and the years ahead, if God lingers or gives me time, I don’t want to be a runaway bride. I want to get to know the groom now. And God’s people said Amen.